chameleon

i am a chameleon. 

some might call it a people pleaser.

this chameleon was inborn in me, just as a individual with an outgoing personality comes out of the womb that way or an adventurous spirit doesn't have to be taught to some children. 

i often hear the term, "people pleaser," talked about in a negative light. as if a "people pleaser's" only motive is to leave all convictions behind in order to be in favor with others. that God always takes a back seat to people. that their only motivation is to be well-liked or popular.

but as a self-proclaimed chameleon, i can tell you that my motivation isn't to leave my convictions or beliefs in the dust in order to fit in. nor DO they get left as i try to please others. my motivation isn't to be popular. perhaps part of it is to be well-liked, but honestly, don't we all want to be well-liked? my desire for people to be happy in my presence or for people to enjoy having a relationship with me hasn't seemed to get in the way of my relationship with God. love God, love others. it seems simple and right. 

as a child and now as an adult, i found that my spirit really struggled with conflict and disharmony and sought to be a peacemaker in those situations. i remember specific times that i would try to use humor to ease tension or dispel anyone's annoyance with me. peacemaker went right along with people pleasing. i am a true pacifist. i can't stand to watch boxing, wrestling, or any kind of fighting. nothing quite stresses me out as much as bickering among my children. 

but yet because i have always heard it talked about as a bad character quality, i have struggled with the knowledge that i want people to be pleased with me. 

the last 7 weeks a group of 12 ladies and i have been pouring over the book of james. we had our final meeting last night, and i am so sad to be done with it. there is almost nothing i love more than getting into the word with a group of women.

in one of our final days of homework, beth used 1 corinthians 9:19-23 as part of her lesson.

i have read this particular verse many times and can almost quote it to you. but this week, beth helped spread new light on it for me.

1 corinthians 9:19-23 says, "though i am free and belong to no one, i have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. to the jews i became like a jew, to win the jews. to those under the law i became like one under the law (though i myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. to those not having the law i became like one not having the law (though i am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. to the weak i became weak, to win the weak. i have become all things to all people so that by all possible means i might save some. i do all this for the sake of the gospel, that i may share in its blessings."

oh, how freeing reading those words were for me!!!! paul was a chameleon too!!!! paul, the same guy who, in the same book, in chapter 11: 1 says, "follow my example, as i follow the example of Christ."!!!!

a chameleon is interested in what her peers are interested in.
a chameleon learns to talk the "language" of his comrades.
a chameleon adheres to rules or convictions of those around him.
a chameleon is willing to serve his friends and neighbors.
a chameleon learns how to relate to people.
a chameleon's ability to blend in with those around her can point people to Christ!

i do not write this to toot my own horn. i will be the first to admit that my motives are not always pure.

i write this for my fellow chameleon friends, who have struggled with the connotations and judgement that has been placed on those who try to please others. i write this for the freedom i have found in this passage of scripture this week, that you might see it that way too! thank-you, dear Father, for putting this part of your image into my spirit!!!